So, here's the deal, we are changing our approach to completing this project. The results of this upwork job have so far been, um..., less than perfect. We hired 4 comedians for this gig (2 outside of upworks). They each produced 35 slap descriptions a total of 175 submissions. We only got about 30 descriptions out of it. Most of the descriptions were simply not funny. (there were also a few which were duplicative or did not follow our instructions). We realize this might be a volume game and more importantly we recognize need to diversify what the comedian writes about during one sitting. With this in mind, we are asking for pay samples of 20 descriptions of each of the below categories for $35 dollars. Again, the idea being maybe your talent is not in Slap descriptions by in one of the other categories.
If you are dissatisfied with the $ compensation, we totally understand. However, we are in talent discovery mode so please do not feel insulted by the offer.
The categories are:
2. I Appreciation you like...
3 I lOVE YOU MORE THAN...
4 Hairline insults
Again, a total of paid 80 samples. (20 each) is needed for the grand total compensation of $35.
Format and examples:
Please note: see original post for rules (link)
MY SLAPBOT JUST SAID:
• “it will slap you so hard the tide will come in”
• “It could slap you harder than Chinese algebra”
• “it will slap you so hard your family tree will fall down”
2. I Appreciate you like…
Please note: these need to appreciate for corporate America. All submissions must be super safe for work
• "I appreciate you like the sea appreciates The Horizon"
• "I appreciate you like a hummingbird appreciates the still of the wind"
• "I appreciate you like a cold appreciates a sneeze "
• "I appreciate you more than a puddle appreciates the rain"
• "I appreciate you like milk and cookies on Christmas Eve"
3. I LOVE YOU MORE THAN...
a. "I love you more than angels love heaven"
b. "I love you more than I did yesterday, but not as much as I will tomorrow..."
c. "I love you more than the moon loves the night"
d. "I love you more than all the water in the ocean"
4. Hairline insults (google them first)
• "Your Hairline is shaped like a hashtag!"
• "Why does look like your hairline is traveling south for the winter?"
• "Your Hairline looks like the McDonald's logo!"
• "Your Hairline is the reason Humpty Dumpty fell off the wall"
• "Your Hairline looks like your barber used a toenail clipper to give you a shape-up!"
• "Your Hairline is the reason Waldo is still hiding
PREVIOUS JOB POST:
We are prototyping a gaming system that would have some funny, smart, college party level humorous phases.
the format will be as follows:
MY SLAP.BOT JUST SAID:
1. it will slap was so hard you’ll come face to face with yourself
2. it will slap you so hard the tide will come in
3. it will fast-slap you so many times the wind from it will give everyone a cold
If the prototype is approved, we will use the same writers to create a few hundred phase that runs the gamut of topics.
Slap.bot WRITING RULES
No Punctuation (the app will handle that)
No copywritten Material mentioned
Do not capitalize the first letter in the sentences (the app will handle that)
No genders, genderless sentences
February 1, 2018
I am looking for freelancers with the lowest rates