Comedy Scriptwriter (US-Based) — 20-Min Scripts for a Faceless Car Channel

We run a faceless YouTube channel built on car culture and comedy — think "did this guy really list a flood-title M3 for $30K, firm, no lowballs." The voice is the whole product. We need a US-based writer who can carry a full 20–30-minute video, start to finish, and make people forget it's 20 minutes. This is not a "generate a script" gig. This is a "make me actually laugh out loud reading it at my desk" gig. What you'll write 20-minute scripts (~2,800–3,400 words) with a killer cold open, a clear through-line, running bits, and a payoff that lands Roast-forward, observational comedy — sharp but never mean-for-mean's-sake; every roast earns a concession, and the great builds get genuine respect Retention-aware structure: hook, re-hooks, no dead air, no throat-clearing intros Who you are: Based in the US (hard requirement — the humor is culturally specific, and we need native car-guy reference fluency; please don't apply if you're not) Actually, funny on the page. You know timing, restraint, and when not to say the joke You know cars — or research them fast enough to sound like you were born in a garage. Marketplace, BaT, forums, the whole ecosystem Reliable on a repeatable cadence. We ship on a schedule Nice to have: Experience writing for VO / faceless / commentary channels You already watch this lane (you'll know the ones) How to apply — read this part, it's the whole test *Put the word OBO at the very top of your proposal so I know you read the post (anything that opens with "Dear Hiring Manager, I am excited about this opportunity" gets deleted). *Send 1–2 samples of your funniest writing — a script, a monologue, a spec, whatever shows voice. Do not send me a résumé of corporate blog posts. *The real audition: pick any ridiculous car listing, mod, or scam you can find online and give me your 3-sentence roast of it. That's it. That tells me more than a portfolio ever will. Rate & volume: [your rate — e.g. $X per finished script, or $X/hr] · [expected volume — e.g. "1–2 scripts/week, ongoing if it's a fit"] We're looking for a long-term writer, not a one-off. Nail the sample and this becomes steady work.